the hostess hotline: 6 conversation starters that will get your guests talking
because great company deserves great conversation
Ring ring!! It’s a call from The Hostess Hotline, your go-to advice line for all things hosting and I’ve got a little something you’ll actually want to answer. Consider this your quick fix for quiet tables and surface-level chatter: six questions guaranteed to get your guests talking.
Have you ever left a gathering and thought to yourself, “Wow, that was quite the party,” or “That’ll be a memorable one for sure”? Yet maybe nothing that big even happened. So what made it feel that way?
Well, let’s tie it first to the company you’re around. One would hope that the people you’re gathering with, or hosting, are ones whose company you actually enjoy. And what does good company bring to the table other than just the obvious “well, a good time, of course”? Yes, yes, I’m sure they do. However, what really good company brings is meaningful, insightful, memorable conversation that keeps the mouths moving all night long; maybe even the minds wandering about those conversations long after.
Don’t get me wrong, I love hearing the good ol’ stories from my friends’ dating lives or what Melissa did at work the other day to “test you AGAIN!!” I do, I really do. But from time to time, it’s important to switch up the energy, to test your minds, to dive a little deeper. Especially if you’ve been friends for a while, these nights filled with more intentional conversation might even need to become mandatory. Because, at the end of the day, why not get to know your friends on an even deeper level beyond the surface?
Like Miranda once said in Sex and the City: “All we ever talk about is men. Can’t we just talk about something else for once?” Of course, she herself talks about men; she even loves helping her friends figure out their situations and giving her input. But from time to time, she gets frustrated that the closest people in her life don’t reach beyond the surface of their conversations. Whether you’re out to eat with friends or hosting a dinner party of sorts, let’s be able to finish our fries and get the table talking.
So, enjoy this call from me to you — let’s debrief, shall we?
Question #1
Who’s the most interesting person you’ve ever met by chance?
Starting off with a bang, this one can be a real thinker. Some people might’ve randomly met a celebrity or someone along those lines, but for most, it might not be so straightforward. If they stumble on the “by chance” part, they can always stick to the main question: “Who’s the most interesting person you’ve ever met?”
Think anywhere from your ninth-grade math teacher to that time you were on the metro and saw a star from that hit Netflix series. No matter the level of “interestingness,” everyone has someone who left a mark.
Question #2
If you had a signature cocktail, what would it be called?
Now, don’t let the simplicity of this one fool you; it can really make people think. Consider not only the name but the personality behind it. What’s its flavor profile? What makes it worth ordering at a cocktail bar?
And please, let’s move past the classic “Well, I’m a tequila soda because I’m crazy!”
No, my dear… you are a Cactus Clementine; served in a coupe, shaken with tequila, clementine juice, agave, and lime, topped with egg white foam and a cactus and clementine skin garnish. You’re that drink because you have a sweet but sassy side, you love being in the heat, summer is your favorite season, and you like to dress up — not for anyone else, but for yourself.
Don’t sell yourself short! And don’t forget the why behind it all.
Question #3
What’s a story your friends always make you tell?
This one’s perfect if you’re at a gathering where not everyone knows each other; you get the spotlight to share that story you’ve told a hundred times, for good reason.
Don’t overthink it. You don’t need to win “Best Storyteller” or make everyone cry laughing. Everyone’s just there for a good time and to hear a fun story.
Whether it’s the time you watched someone steal ten bottles of olive oil and fail miserably (poor soul), or when you went cliff jumping and fell in love with your instructor… there’s always a story worth telling. So tell yours, and listen up to those around you.
Question #4
What’s a city you could see yourself living in and why?
This is one I absolutely adore, for more than one reason. First, it’s simple. It doesn’t require storytelling skills or drama, just honest reflection. Second, it makes you think: out of all the places in the world, where would you feel most at home?
And third, I live abroad and have for a bit now, and it’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me. So I love asking this, because you never know… this could become the very conversation you think back to one day when people in your new city ask, “So, what made you move here?”
Question #5
What’s something you learned the hard way — but you’re glad you did?
This one might open up a few loose ties; maybe even a tear or two. But don’t let that stop you. It’s important to let people think, pause, and share.
Not only does this invite deeper connection, but it helps you reflect too. We’ve all had those lessons that shaped us, the ones that hurt at the time but made us stronger. So… what’s yours?
Question #6
What’s something you’ve done that you think everyone should try at least once?
You might need a minute to think, or maybe you already know your answer. For me, I’d of course say to move, or at least study, abroad and explore beyond where you’re from.
For others, it could be to go on a blind date, take a solo trip that shifts your perspective, or make homemade Christmas gifts for everyone one year to show your love and appreciation.
Whatever it may be, or how random it is, there’s wisdom in everything we try; and there’s always something worth passing along.
Within these six questions, I hope you found at least one that sparks some curiosity and adds a little magic to your next get-together. Some are light and playful, others a bit more vulnerable, but always remember, you’re friends for a reason. You’re there to support each other, share laughter, and create new stories to tell next time.
With that said, consider your audience and the questions you choose; keep the night flowing smoothly and the conversation flowing.
That’s all for now from your personal Hostess Hotline. Until next time, my darling.
Xoxo,
Avalon